Pink Chanel I'm just like you

At 23 - people come and go
posted on Sunday, October 5, 2014 at 7:17 PM | 0 cmnt/s

So yesterday, 

I had a conversation with my bestfriend and she mentioned. "We're 23, we are suppose to already be engaged or have someone stable." I told her " Babe we're still young." I don't know if I am saying that to make myself feel better or it is really the fact that we're still young. REALLY. 

Most my secondary school mates are married and have a maximum of 3 children. Yes, 23 and have 3 kids. I envy you for being so fortunate in love with so much blessing from the love cupid to fall in love with right guy. (unlike me over here, stupid cupid always give me lots of problems). So this kinda thing, depleted my circle of friends. Honestly, I really think that I was the one who was gonna get married first. It never came across that they actually got married before me! YES. During those days, I had a boyfriend and they don't. & then after graduation, the next thing I know one by one has got married and already giving birth. 

As I grow older, like in my late teens, I come to a realization that my prince charming is not coming any sooner due to reality checks. ( wait, i get back to you what i mean by reality checks) Nevermind that I had a bad relationship twice ( I swore never to fall in love again)  and my parents wanted to get a separation not once but many many times. & then I turned 18, I had my first internship of my life getting myself ready to fight in the real world, I've seen married/engaged couples cheating with their partner. I even wonder if i get married, will my husband cheat on me with someone from the office like all these men who're married with kids flirting with other younger women, like me :) In the office right now, I do come across one or two who're married and asked me out for dinner and one even asked for my number ever since my first day of work on Jan 08 2014 up till today. It is wrong to be "bestfriends" with a girl you just met a few weeks ago. Of course I do not give up my number or even go on "friendly" dinner. Older men thinks that they can get younger girls simply because we are young. 

So tell me how can I not have a phobia to get married? 

with that aside 

I do have "friends" who thinks they're oh so perfect. Who thinks that I am jealous with her "perfect" life. Yea, you've stopped clubbing and start praying, going for religious classes & getting married of course, like who can miss that out. But that does not mean that you're all "grown up"
and you can look down on people like me who're still partying, don't have a stable boyfriend. Yea, I still party at 23. So what? I don't have a stable boyfriend. I don't have a stable boyfriend not because that I have this "wild" very "open" lifestyle you know. Is just that I accept that mine is not here yet, you know. That also does not mean that I don't have a stable job. Excuse me, I am not a job hopper :) I worked for TS for almost 3yrs plus and reason for me to quit was because I want to changed into an office environment and then I moved on to my 2013 resolution which was to start working at a new environment. & I can proudly say that my CPF and working attitude is def better way better than any of my friends at my age  :) I worked since I was 17 with a CPF contribution up till today. So, you do the math. If I ever get married, I don't have problem getting myself a flat :) so just because found yourself an older guy does not mean that your life is better than everyone else. I don't hate you of course. I just wanna say that you cannot run too far from your past, eventually it will catch up with you. :)  & this explains why I am single. I have everything I need and ever wanted I just do not have a love life like any of my "friends" but that does mean that I am jealous. I am genuinely and sincerely happy for you. I do not understand why must you put me aside. People come and go, you're just another one who didn't stay in my life.   

So, at 23 many people come and go. Mostly have their own families and life. The rest are just another pain that I do not need. 

& back to my reality checks on my prince charming ... 

I will post it whenever I am free :)

Life is still as it is ...
posted on Saturday, August 16, 2014 at 7:07 PM | 0 cmnt/s

& so, I am turning 23 years old this year. They say, once you've passed 21, time flies extremely fast. Is like the next thing you know, you're already 30! (WOAH, THAT IS HUGE) Like everyone else, I am afraid to grow old.

As usual, people come and go. Time didn't heal anything actually, it just kinda make me forget or move on or live it or maybe DEAL with it. There was a period or "season"? that I thought, i repeat I THOUGHT - or my brain thinks or maybe my heart felt "in love" ergh, typing out "in love" already makes me sick. I told myself many many many many times not to fall or have feelings involved and yes, I failed, unfortunately. That was my first time after my bad relationship during my late teens (ahems I'm in my early 20s now hehe) I actually fell for someone. Stupidly, foolishly fell. I was disappointed, sad and angry. The mixed emotions I had was crazy.

Anyway ...

Besides all that, I've already moved on to another different path. I finally got over and with retail. Ok, so retail was just a part-time job kinda thing. I didn't want to pursue it any further ..

I remembered blogging about what soap I used for my bad blemished, acne skin. So, here is a picture that was taken today with very make up skill of course and is not filtered or edited.



It's not flawless nor clean. I'm so happy w the fact I can put on make up. I've always been so envious with those girls who can play with make up. I wasn't jealous of course, I'm always content with what I have. Right now, I am dealing with scars, marks, large pores. I'm quite stable with the facial products that I am currently using.  




I just feel like blogging. Now that I am working on weekdays, I'm sure I have the time on weekends that is if I feel like blogging.







I spent my Saturday almost the whole day at the River Safari. Company Family Day, 14'.
It didn't rain at all, thank god for that. I was literally with the boy above ( I don't even know his name) but he is so cute. & I was drained out.


Till next time!

xx
Shiela

-
posted on Thursday, December 26, 2013 at 2:36 AM | 0 cmnt/s

Well, as you can see I've been updating much lately.

 Yes - I've got a camera now and a laptop but unfortunately, I am so bloody lazy. 
This is like my last priory ever. 

 ...
Lucky or not so lucky in love?

 So, some people are blessed w love. Apparently, their cupid shot the bullseye.
to be in love w the same person for the rest of their lives.
Honestly, I envy you people!  I would loveee to grow old w my so called "other half"
It makes me wonder why am I not lucky? 
Why do I have t end up w jerks and assholes. 

 Well, you see, I come to a point where I figured not everybody is exactly happy w what they have. 
They have their flaws. 
You may have the ever so perfect loving boyfriend/husband 
but somewhere in your life, there is something wrong. 
your working life, your friends oh i don't know. 
just somewhere.

 Or how one can be so smart/pretty and all but yet she is not in love. 
Why is that so?

 For me?

I have a loving father and mother who dotes me a lot. 
They say, i'm spoiled which obviously i disagree. 
I know how hard it is to earn money. 
Just that I am lucky t always get what I want. 
too bad, i can't have a boyfriend. 
Not that I can't. I just haven't met the right one yet. 

 After 3 years of being single, I'm actually quite fine w it. 
I don't get it why some people will be like "ohhh, 5 mths single or whatever"
Why do you have to tell e world about it?
Personally, I am not that type t actually post a photo of every guy i met. 
Mayb one or two. 
I made a vow that this time, when I fall in love, it will be my last.

too much.
posted on Wednesday, November 20, 2013 at 1:25 AM | 0 cmnt/s

You know as much as I want to fall in love ... 

I forgot how it feels like to have someone, somebody special. 
I am sure everybody wants right?

& also I forgot how it hurts so much when your heart breaks.
it hurts so much that I swore never to love again.

They say, you are still young. Keep your options open. 
I envy those who are blessed w love. 

Why do we take advantage when we found someone who loves us more than we do? 
Don't bluff okay. I know one or two. 
But really, why?

When we are seeing someone else are they allowed to see someone else too?
Like we are just erm "dating" or "contacting". 
I mean is it okay? 

Is it just me being so insecure? or paranoid? 

I started going crazy when I got to know like from one thing t another. 
Like why can't you b honest w me? 
Even the littlest thing. 

Yes, actions speaks louder. 
But can't you see all the efforts I put in? 
But I see no proof for me to trust.
I put the trust in you but .. 

I am not jealous. 
Yes, I am so hurt. 
No, we are no official. 
Yes, I understand. 
Yes, I accept. 
No, this heartache I've been feeling is killing me.

I even cried. 
I don't know why. 

up to date
posted on Monday, October 7, 2013 at 3:23 AM | 0 cmnt/s

Okay, wait. Erm not exactly up-to-date ...

 My blog has been dead for like e longest time ever. 
God knows how did I managed to blog so much (too much maybe)
Idk who is reading but to hell w that. 


 Welcoming in w the month of October ...
(funny how time flies so fast eh)

 & unfortunately, my year wasn't that good.
There were days when I felt like the whole world was against me.
& times when I feel like slapping myself right in e face. 

 I've lost my friends & sometimes I feel like as tho I lost myself too. 
& you can forget about " they say, friends come and go, this and that" .. (0.o)
But let's not put so much emotional stuffs here, shall we? 
I'm full of positivity. ( if you think i am not, you know no shit about me)










Apologies for the bad quality photo :) :)
But can see right? As long as can see, it wouldn't be much of a problem.

 Thank you girls for the treat. 
& I'm glad to have my two siblings here w me. (despite everything else) 

About a year ago, I made a mistake by perming my hair. 
IT WENT HORRIBLE. 
So then, I had chopped it off ( remain it as my original wavy hair)
until about a year later, I rebond it again. 
Most def, I've no regrets with that. 
I am just waiting for my hair to grow :D



HAIR GROW PLEASE HAIR GROW PLEASE.

 till then, I don't know when will i ever have the time to blog and edit and post. 
xoxo

Just a thought.
posted on Thursday, August 22, 2013 at 3:12 AM | 0 cmnt/s

I want to fall in love and forget the world. Not until literally but yeah - something like that. 
Also, falling in love w someone who supports me w what I want for my future. 
Like, being together walking side by side holding hands and not taking charge of me. 
Because I already know what I want.

 Most of friends are already attached and honestly, I do feel a slight of "envious". 
But hey! No rush right? But wait, I am not getting any younger so erm I do feel a little bit scared. 
What if I turn into an old bird w 12 cats?

I don't know about my date life but I can never find anyone perfect. 
Define perfect? Like - my kind of guy. 
He don't have to be so handsome, so rich, so fair so tall or even so smart. 
He just have to be perfect in my eyes. *.*

&& I have no luck w that. 
I don't want to be wasting my time w a year or less. 

 Funny how there was once I met someone who happened to be my friend's sister's boyfriend. 
Uh huh - tell me about it.

Eid' 2013
posted on Monday, August 19, 2013 at 11:29 PM | 0 cmnt/s


Eid 2013

 1st Day of Syawal

 Oh well, I think every year it's kinda the same. Only thing is that, your family will be expanding.
&& when they expanded, you see one or two people not there anymore cause they have their other half.

 When I was younger, I felt like I have a huge family. 
We hired a bus and go to every house till late. 
Then, when I got older, my family is actually really small. 

 Outfit: Whole suit is from KL, Shoes is from New Look and bag is from CO.
Don't you like the colour coordination? I do! HEHEHE.





Uh huh, we went to the park and took pictures. 
TO THAT EXTEND? YES.


Not forgetting this year, is also my first year celebrating e festive season w Lenny and Andi. 
Oh, I was really out of place during the 1st Day of Syawal over at Andi's Aunty house right opp his house. 
But thank goodness I am not a shy person. Just a few mins of awkwardness and I was fine :) 

 2nd Day of Syawal

 Because I had a bad hair day, I didn't take much pictures. 
The usual open house over at Yunisha's. 
Usual cousins from JB and KL came over. 
The usual food. 
7th Day of Syawal

House visiting w BFF at the very very very last min. 
My celebrations pretty much ends here :)

I bet everybody enjoyed theirs! 

 Till next time! 
xx

posted on Friday, July 12, 2013 at 9:00 PM | 0 cmnt/s

Well, it's kinda belated to wish him here. 
I didn't miss his birthday.

 So ....







HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE KING OF MY OF LIFE. 

Yes, they always say we grow up so fast that we didn't realized that our parents are turning grey and old. 
My dad here is 47 this year, 3 more years to the big 50!

I would like to say that I am really fortunate to have the best dad in e world. I know whenever you're up my ass and it gets really annoying but I know that is always the best for me. Thank you so much for always being there for me, your sacrifices to give me the wonderful and greatest things in life like a roof over my head, an education and all the smallest things. 

I want you see me get married, have my own house, my "mini me" because I am pretty sure I still need you even when I have my own life w another man who is gonna take over your responsibility of me.

You have done a great job w being a dad! I love you many many! 


posted on Friday, June 28, 2013 at 2:16 AM | 0 cmnt/s

Happy Birthday my darling, Andi!!!!

 Though we just met like less than 5 mths, I'm glad we became such good friends. 
This boy here taught me how to become so vain. 
All my beau tips are all from him. 

 Wishing you the best in life.
Also, I hope you enjoyed your "mini surprised".






Birthday was celebrated under the Void Deck.
Nothing fancy, well we all had work the next day.
2 hours of surprised was well spent. 
After all, it's the thought that count :) 





Best girl here. 

 We fight like siblings, we fight because we still hold on to each other.
We've been through shit and tough times. 
I still love you, babe. xoxo

oh just posting.
posted on Sunday, June 23, 2013 at 2:16 AM | 0 cmnt/s


Sometimes I feel like I am in two different worlds. 
I don't know about others, but I have two different group of people. 

My friends who're about around my age and under.
and my other friends who're a few years older than me. 
You can really see the difference you know.

``


 I've gained so much weight. 
I've gotten so many feedbacks/comments from my friends, ex work mates and family. 
"You've gained so much".  Erm, is this part of growing up? 


Because I am still young, I would love to try out new things/places or whatever.
Like, juggling w time, balancing work, family and friends.
& this year I managed to get a chance to be working w my friends for Asia's Beerfest 13'.
Not as a "beergirl" but just as the ticketing person or should I say "cashiers"
The environment was different, everything was different. 
I've never worked in a place w no aircon, just fan. 
Nothing systematic. 

Thank god I didn't take Events Management when I was still schooling.








This event was about two weeks ago, excuse me for the late post :)

Now, I've been working for like 14 days straight. 
Mind you, my body clock was drastically changed, I had to re-adjust back halfway w no off day. 
Not complaining.  

 Shall update soon. xx
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